So you think it is a competition?

Assalamualaikum & Hello All

Is PhD a competition? If it is, then what sort of a competition is it? Enlighten me please for I have been ignorant or non-competitive for the past 15 months or so. Oh boy, am I doomed? No no no...

Personally, I don't think that PhD is a competition in anyway or with anyone but you.  As mentioned in my earlier post, my stance with regards to PhD is about discovering my true potential, my true self, pushing myself to the edge and also about achieving the Self-Actualization stage. I never ever imagine that it would be a competition with anyone.

Why should it be a competition when;

•       we have diverse working style,
•       none of us are doing the same thing,
•       we are all pacing at different speed,
•       each and every one of us are we are steering through so many different directions and
•        living our personal lives at the same time

I’d be dumbfounded and rather speechless when being asked questions that I myself don’t have answers for such as;

1.   How come you are still doing that when I am already doing this? (Erkkk!seriously?)
2.   Didn’t you start last year? Why are you so slow? (Is this is a gentle way of telling me that I am an idiot?) 
3. Are you having trouble with your studies that you are not progressing as you should be? (So, your studies are trouble-free? Wow, you are so fluky, I am green with envy *puke*)

Like seriously, PhD is unlike Undergrad or even Masters (by coursework that is) where you attend classes, submit assignments and sit for exams. There’s a lot of competition going on while at that stage but not anymore, not at the PhD stage. The only competition that exists now is within you. How you strategize, how you achieve the objectives, how you overcome the obstacles and most importantly your attitude towards the whole PhD journey.

Last but not least, this is just my 2 cents. You don’t have to agree or disagree with me, no obligations. However I appreciate you taking time to read this post.

Thank You for your time

Miss F.

Stressful September

Assalamualaikum & Hello all

 

How fast time flies? It has been 3 months since my last post. I have not been lazy, but crazy busy and I blame it on September. Well actually I lied, I did manage to squeeze a 3 week holiday back home. It was indeed a much needed break from all the dramas that was happening at that time. Not drama drama, I just like to call it drama, so it sounds a bit dramatic. Ahah, now I understand why some friends call me Drama Queen. I take it as a compliment, Thank You

Ok back to the point. A really quick glance on what happened for the past 3 months. The major stuff would be moving to a new place. Yes, I found a flat mate and I am now living in a bigger place compared to my cozy little studio where I can’t bake (because there’s no oven and if I were to buy an oven, I would have to put it on my bed). LoL

What about this new place? Before I go there, let me talk about the whole planning and organizing the move. That was added stress to my already stressful life. Everything here is about money (lots of them to be precise). I took 3 weeks off work (more specifically my PhD) just to organize the whole moving out episode. But looking back, it was just perfect timing since I was dealing with a ‘psycho’ at work who sits next to me. Oh my goodness, I can understand that some people are not ‘socially gifted’ but this guy is a total retard. I mean seriously. I don’t intend to dedicate a post about him just because he gave me a hard time. I don’t want you all to be stressed, that’s all.. LoL

There were so many things I had to organize such as: cleaning service (because I want my bond money back), movers (because I don’t have a car or a boyfriend with a car), electrical good (the new place is unfurnished and my future flat mate was at a conference that time), bed (or at least a mattress), dining table, sofas and etc.  It might seem like petty but it is not. Somehow I am glad I made the point to do my research and took time to really plan everything accordingly. Moving house is a BIG DEAL.

To cut the story short, I moved in officially on the 15^th July (fasting month) and sort of settled it as quickly as I could. I wasn’t sure if I did settle in then or later since my mind was more focused on the idea of going home for Hari Raya (Eid). Anyway, I flew back to Penang on the 1^st August and returned to Melbourne on the 20^th August. It was indeed timely that I went back. After all the stress and dramas, I came back with renewed energy and spirit.

Me & Chris (My awesome SV)

So the new drama begins as soon as I came back but I was prepared for it, in fact I was waiting for it since few months ago. My confirmation of candidature (CoC) oral presentation date has been confirmed. I was thrilled when I got the news (told myself to panic later). And the preparation took place. Proposal need to be edited and proofread before submission. Final final final draft to be read by my Supervisors. Not to forget the HDR Mini Conference a.k.a. The Annual Review would be happening the following week. So it’s double drama. Nice. However, I have to deal with it, like it or not. If I succeed, it would be the first milestone in my PhD, officially. Now you get the idea why I call this post Stressful September.

In a nutshell, I survived both the presentation and I am proud of myself even though it is just a small achievement. Nevertheless, I could have not done it without the unending support and guidance from my Supervisors, the ongoing encouragement and motivation from my writing support group (imagine people who are willing to spend their afternoon helping you practice your presentation and being make-believe panel members); I couldn’t ask for more. Maybe one day I will dedicate a post about my awesome support group girls J

From left: Afzalina, Alison, Me, Pei & Vassilissa (my support group, my gang!)

 

 Not to forget my family, friends and colleagues for their prayers and well wishes. Stressful September is over and work is becoming more challenging as my Supervisor expects me to raise the bar (oh no) and I expect myself to raise the bar too (seriously?).  Well, whatever it is, I will just keep going.

 Thank You for reading

 

Miss F.